


A Light in the Grey

by DrivvenWrinth



Category: Original Work
Genre: Chronic Illness, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:27:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27084085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrivvenWrinth/pseuds/DrivvenWrinth
Summary: More Musings. Written for all those who supported me while I struggled with my chronic debilitating illness.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	A Light in the Grey

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FairyNiamh](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FairyNiamh/gifts).



There is a grey mist that swirls beyond my attention. It is still and permanent yet swirling and ever changing. It is nothing and it is everything. There are bright spots in it, blanketing it. Like stars in a night sky. I can see/feel lines connecting some of them. This is a place without time or space. A moment is a year. A thousand miles is immediate. They connect in a way that is beyond comprehension. These lights are souls/lives in the world and beyond. The swirling and undulating of the 'grey' is the passage of time, the movement of worlds. These souls are connected yet may not meet for centuries. This is the fabric of fate.

I am one among many. I am here and yet I am there. I can reach out for others and hide if I do not wish them to reach out to me. I can pull the fabric of the 'grey' over me like a blanket and harden it like a shield. I can be invisible to them that might harm me.

There are other things in the 'grey', voids that speak of dark thoughts and dark purpose. They seek out the lights, they crave the souls. Some infect and harm them, others destroy. The worst are the ones that feed upon the souls. There are the leeches that suck the joy, the love, and the health of the soul. They feed slowly, taking great joy in filling the empty spaces within the soul with their own darkness. There are those that feed all at once, tearing the soul from the fabric of the 'grey', leaving an empty space that tugs at the others, rippling across the twinkling sea of nothing and all.

There is a bright spot inside my mind, connected to my soul. It is smaller than me and burns a different shade than I am. This little spot is like a door, it is a tunnel, a corridor that if followed will lead e to another light, another soul. This is a link between me and another across space and time immeasurable. This person is more precious to me than my own existence. This being glows with a warmer, gentler light. I am harsh and guttering. I am chaos, this is calm. I am anger, this is joy.

I am careful when I open myself up to the 'grey'. When I pull back that wall inside my mind and perceive the vast expanse of 'all'. I do not wish to attract the 'dark'. I may at times reach out to another light across the swirling mist. It is risky and only done when necessary. For I might draw one of the dark ones to me. If it finds me, it may find the other light connected to me. I will not risk that one. I will protect this other light, for it is the other half of me. Without it I am no more than a half-light and that I am afraid may be far worse than being nothing at all.

I am a light in a sea of 'grey'. I ride the wave and stay in the same place even as I move. I am a piece of something that is nothing and all. I can see others twinkling in the mist. I can see and feel the darkness pass over and around. I am not alone, none of us are. We are little lights woven into a tapestry beyond measure and when we find the strands that bind us together, we are less alone than any one thing among many could ever be.

Written for my lights. Thank you for anchoring me here in this place while letting me float free.


End file.
